Killer Kale and the Spinach of Doom: Britain’s Salad Bowl Turns Biohazard

Forget crocodiles or undercooked chicken — it’s your smug pre-washed rocket that’s out to get you. Salad’s no longer part of a balanced diet… it’s part of a crime scene.

Now look, I’ve eaten a lot of salad in my life. Not because I particularly like salad, I’m not a goat, but because I’ve lived with a vegetarian for 30 years and well, marriage is a negotiation. You take the bins out and in return, your dinner occasionally looks like it was foraged from a hedge.