The Curse of Tutankhamun... Now in a Test Tube Near You

Ancient tomb fungus once blamed for killing archaeologists is now targeting leukaemia cells; scientists cheer, while Barry from Ibiza prepares to launch his scarab-infused healing tea!

If only I had a pound for every time I read a story like this… about some ancient, oozing, festering substance turning out to be the next miracle cancer cure; I’d finally be able to afford one of those sugar-free almond flat whites from that smug cafe that also sells dreamcatchers and reiki.

Last week’s headline reads like a rejected Indiana Jones script…